j us t:: escap ed

she sat on the bench, waiting...

- are you waiting for someone?
- my friend is coming
- are you sure?
- he said he'll always be there
- you mean here
- well ...
- you just missed him (?) ... he left
- but ...
- ... you have to go on, you can't expect him to wait a life time
- it wasn't that long
- it was to him

she never meant to do it, it happened somehow
ironically happened
he suffocated her, so she said
she couldn't explain it and he couldn't understand it

he found everything passing him by
everyone was growing
he was shrinking

he felt small,

imprisoned

chained

alienated

he wanted to change,
not that he was scared

he needed to

he had to

he couldn't wait anymore.
...
so he did
he stood up ... left the bench.

... he went on

f::: you

there's a look on your face i would like to knock out

[...]

all i want is to see you in terrible pain
though we won't ever meet i'll remember your name

can't believe you were once just like anyone else
then you grew and became like the devil himself
pray to God I can think of a nice thing to say
but I don't think I can so fuck you anyway

[...]

when you look at yourself do you see what i see
if you do why the fuck are you looking at me

Archive

::absurd

it's so absurd
i can't think of anything to start with
it's been a while,
so many ideas but nothing is coming out

Blurred

Blanked

... maybe later

cheers darlin'

cheers darlin'
here's to you and your lover boy
cheers darlin'
I got years to wait around for you
cheers darlin'
I've got your wedding bells in my ear
cheers darlin'
you give me three cigarettes to smoke my tears away

[...]

what am I darlin'?
a whisper in your ear?
a piece of your cake?
what am I, darlin?
the boy you can fear?
or your biggest mistake?

[...]

Damien Rice

un::named memories (this one is old)

it's getting darker
... and darker

eyes closed.
mouth shut.

can you hear the fire cracks ?
warmth creeps from behind

fire,
light,
darkness ...

something tickles
something stirs

memories ... disturbing memories

why does it happen every time it's quiet
every time,
everyday.

ever felt a grab from behind ??
a smell from the past ...
a touch that would always last

it's really too bad
too bad ... in fact too sad

why am i here alone between all my friends
laughs and shouts all around
still i can't hear a sound

i am away
so far away
still stuck...

in memories ... bad memories

damn!

quietpl::ease

that's too many ideas
too many advices
you're giving me a headache

stop hammering me !!

it's all in your head mate
it's all in your head
...it's all in my head

stop.

i might be::wrong

what's done is done

you just wish you could write this final chapter again
but you'll screw up again and again
i might be wrong, but you will screw up
coz no one deserves so much

there's nothing more left to say
there's nothing more left to do

everything betrays you

some shitty dog barks all night long.
you try to sleep
you close your eyes

remember mate, it's all in your head

you close your eyes
it's all dark, as usual
somehow you manage to see

blankness, emptiness
you are floating down
nothing to hold on to
yet you are not afraid

you go down slowly,
you know it will hurt
you know you fell in ....

Open your eyes !!

i've been there once, and it's not that pleasant

the day light breaks in
and some shitty dog still barks the hell out of your ears

you wake up
feeling better,
knowing you're not

someday you'll be more productive,
healthier,
less bad dreams,
no regrets,
happier?


but who knows, i might be wrong...

...

close the door when you leave ...

you'll keep the car
i'll take the plastic vase


snap shot

- never wanted anything special
never asked for more than that
i was the one who always cared
- well i don't give a damn


the door slams ...

some new year just started::

a new year...
everything seems to be the past
everything seems to be the last

... nothing would ever last

and this play will never end
it's going over and over,
round and round.
... nothing changes but the crowd

they all watch, silently
some fortunates understand (you don't)
some react (you don't)

anger, rage, shame
fear, sadness and blame
they all mix up and make of you
a person ... you thought you knew

did you know, you must loose some when going down...
oh, i meant up ?

anyways, it's a new year
or is it ? ...